Favorite Christmas Books

Honestly, I have a lot of favorites, so here are just a few.

Classic story, love Jan Brett.

So this one's more wintery than Christmasy, but I still love it. I wrote more about this book and my love affair with snow in this post.

And even though I have certain feelings about the whole Santa Claus thing, I still like this book.

You?

Another dream/possible book

Recently, I had a dream that was so vivid that I woke up and remembered the entire storyline, which is a rarity. Here's the premise:

An older woman with a grown daughter adopted a baby (a cute little Asian baby girl, if you want to get specific) and later married a questionable man. When the woman died, the adopted 3-year-old daughter stayed with this man, but the woman's grown daughter thought the child should stay with her.

So she hired a killer to off her step-father.

Are you kidding me? (And no, I'm not kidding about using the word "off.") What made-for-TV movie had I been watching in order to have a dream like this? My dreams are almost NEVER this exciting.

So what do you say? It should totally be a book, right? This is said in jest, of course, because thrillers are not really my cup of tea. But someone should write it. Or at least write a screenplay and send it to Lifetime . . .

Writing gets harder

This quote from author Keith Ridgway (via Nathan Bransford) has been on my mind, lately:

I’ve written six books now, but instead of making it easier, it has complicated matters to the point of absurdity. I have no idea what I’m doing. All the decisions I appear to have made—about plots and characters and where to start and when to stop—are not decisions at all. They are compromises. A book is whittled down from hope, and when I start to cut my fingers I push it away from me to see what others make of it. And I wait in terror for the judgements of those others—judgements that seem, whether positive or negative, unjust, because they are about something that I didn’t really do. They are about something that happened to me. It’s a little like crawling from a car crash to be greeted by a panel of strangers holding up score cards.

When I was finally finished with the first real draft of LITTLE SUN, this is pretty much how I felt.  The part about how a book is something "whittled down from hope," the part about how a book just happens, the part about feeling like you're emerging from a car crash—basically everything. He nailed it.

And knowing that Ridgway said this after he had written six books doesn't make me feel that much better, frankly, since I've only written 1.3 books. (A draft of a children's book + semi-begun plans for a middle grade novel = .3, by the way, in case you were unfamiliar with literary math.) So Book 1 was hard, but learning that it only gets harder? Awesome.

But for some reason, it's worth it. For some reason, I feel compelled, even driven, to continue to write books. I don't know all of the reasons why. I know some of them, but not all. Much of the whole thing still remains a mystery. And I guess that's one of the reasons that continue to drive me—a need to solve this mystery. So that I will do: continue.

Gullibility

The other night, I totally fell for it. In a Netflix series I had been watching, one of the characters died, and I totally took it seriously. I believed it and was seriously so sad. She was a vital part of the story, and I was totally baffled as to how the writers could possibly do such a thing. And the fact that I have used "totally" in nearly every sentence so far shows you how truly distressed I was. I avoided watching the show for the next few days because I was bothered. When I finally sat down and watched the next episode, it turned out that this character had just been in a deep coma or something and quit breathing, but she came back to life. Totally ridic—even for being set in a far simpler time, medically—but I'll admit I felt so much better.

And simultaneously so sheepish that I had fallen for it and let myself get so caught up in a silly show. It reminded me of how I was so sucked in to the beginning of the book Life of Pi that I actually thought it was a true story. (Read about it on the other blog here, but only if you want to mock me for being scared of a baby racoon—'cause that's what'll happen after you read this post.)

So while I was balancing feelings of both relief and chagrin, I started to chide myself for being so gullible. But then I thought, no. Maybe the getting sucked in and the believing is just the mark of good writing. I'd be thrilled if someone thought my book was a true story, at least sort of. Thrilled and then only slightly concerned. But maybe writers would consider it a compliment, so I'm not going to be embarrassed anymore. Just appreciative of the captivating and sometimes spellbinding fun and adventure literature (and Netflix) can bring to the world.

Some Thoughts About Words

1. Someone told me long ago that foreign speakers always seem to think English has an overabundance of S sounds. When I think of that while speaking, I get kind of self-conscious . . . I mean anxious . . . I mean painfully aware. There, no S's. 
2. If I were to ask you what the most beautiful word in the English language is, what would you say? Another someone told me long ago that it was thought to be "murmur." I never really learned or could figure out why. Probably because it doesn't have any S's. Do you agree with their selection?
3. On the other hand, I saw this on the Merriam-Webster site the other day and was totally delighted: A top 10 list of Funny-Sounding and Interesting Words. I loved the sound of #1, but I was won over by the fact that #7, "widdershins," used to mean a bad hair day. Let's bring it back!

Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving is not known for its amazing children's books. And I'm probably going to be too busy eating my weight in my mother's rolls to do anything about it, but if I have a minute, I may pull out this one-and-only classic from my childhood.

A very unusual holiday story, but you might say it's the perfect bridge between Halloween and Thanksgiving. Because witches celebrate too.

Do you have any Thanksgiving favorites I just don't know about?

Names

Choosing names for characters in my book was an interesting experience because all of them seemed to come about differently. Long before I had a finished manuscript or even a chapter one, I had the first sentence of the book. And I wanted to fit that in with the main character's name, so that's how I got her name. I had a certain idea of what the dad would be like, so I picked a name that seemed to fit. The mother's name was a little more elusive. I tried out a few different names, but none of them seemed right. They sounded fake, which indeed they were, but I wanted them to sound real. Oh, the irony... After a while, I happened upon the right one (after searching popular girls' names from the 1960s when she would have been born, had she been real), and I knew it instantly.

It was an involved process to name the main characters, but sometimes I only needed to come up with a throwaway name for another student we'd never see in the book again. And I wanted those to sound real too. I tried to pick middle-of-the-road names—names that were a little unique, something unlike Bob Johnson, perhaps, but not too unique so that the name detracted from the story, like Petal Kazowsky, for example. Although the more I look at Petal Kazowsky, the more I like it. Maybe I'll use it in another book someday . . .

It was this way with place names too. Sometimes I used combinations of names and places that were familiar to me, and sometimes I dreamed something up in my head, only to look it up and see that it was an actual place and the name of several cities across the U.S.—and none of them near me. True story.

Anyway, this is all to say that it was sometimes hard to come up with the right names, names that felt right. For characters, I tried to use different kinds of names: modern, classic, ethnically diverse. And while I was in the thick of writing, I was absolutely fascinated when I came across this supercool map of surnames in an issue of National Geographic.

Here's a link to the NGM blog post about it, where you can also enlarge the map in case you don't have superhuman vision.

Anyway, it's incredibly interesting to me to see how common last names are distributed in the U.S. It shows the countries of origin for the surnames, and you can see patterns of where immigrants from certain countries settled. The article also listed a website that lets you find hot spots for last names around the world: http://worldnames.publicprofiler.org/ You can look up your own, and it's very, very interesting. Frankly, I didn't know Scoresby was of Celtic origin.

So I tore out the map, and now I keep it in my writing stuff because I love it and it's useful to look at if I can't think of last names for my characters. Besides Smith, Johnson, and Miller, there are plenty to choose from.

QUESTIONS: What are some of the best names in literature? What would you say makes a good name? Any names that have bothered you?

If I were to write a book based on the dream I recently had . . .

. . . here would be the synopsis:  In a not-too-distant apocalyptic future, war is on and I am in the business of making special coats for people to wear to keep out harmful radiation, or something, which was called meconium. The coats looked like they were made of purplish-blue reformed laundry lint, so I don't know how effective they were at keeping anything out.

In the dream, I remember talking to some lady about how much I was selling the coats for. ($39.99, if you must know.)

She said, "If you really are trying to help the human race, why are you charging seven times what it costs to make them?"

I believe I said something in response about profit margins.

My dream brain is smart. Also, I almost never have interesting dreams, so this was a special occasion.

So this leaves me with two questions:

1. True or False: At the time I had this dream, I was studying up on how to care for the caterpillars—and resulting caterpillar waste (a.k.a meconium)—that my daughter got in the mail. (You decide.)

2. Is this book idea the bombdigity, or what?

Distractions

I've said before that I have ADGD: Attention Deficit Google Disorder. It seems like every time I sit down at the computer to do pretty much anything, my mind suddenly thinks up 10 or 20 other things I need to google RIGHT THEN—approximately one per minute—and none of them relating to what I sat down to do.

Distractions, when writing, are a given. And google's only one of them. Here's what I have to do to stay focused:

1. Makes rules for myself. When I sit down to write, I have to mentally tell myself email and facebook are not allowed. Otherwise, if left to my own unruly devices, I will be emailing my great-aunt, thinking I have good reason, before you can say chapter 1. And my brain will always justify getting distracted, so I have to stay on top of it. I don't always keep the rules, and I allow myself some messing around once in a while, but if I want to get anything done, this is sometimes what I have to do.

2. Treat myself. Making rules also may or may not involve rewarding myself if I keep said rules. Sometimes I say to myself, "I'll write for the next hour, and then I can watch the next episode of _______." Or "After I finish this scene, I will look up new recipes for a dessert I have to make." I can focus more if there's an end in mind and a reward, no matter how pitiful.

(Also, is it weird that the brain that justifies any distraction is the same brain that makes the rules and gives the rewards? Does this make me totally insane? Possibly. Or maybe it's just called self-control. Who's to say?)

3. Take notes. I set a notepad by me wherever I'm writing so that when my brain will think of anything and everything but writing and come up with a bunch of things I just HAVE to do right then, I write them down so I don't forget. But then I wait until later to do them. This notepad habit also works for getting writing ideas when I'm not at my computer. I have two notebooks in my purse, several random notes on my phone, and post-it notes coming out my ears.

Do you make rules for yourself about stuff? Please say yes so I don't feel like a total nut bag.

Revising: Overused Words

One of the things I consciously tried to regulate, whilst working on my novel, was word frequency. I remember Stephenie Meyer being mocked for using "liquid topaz" on nearly every page of Twilight to describe Edward's eyes, and I knew I had to work hard so no one could mock me for anything similar.

And I thought I was safe. But one friendly critiquer brought it to my attention that there was a word I used much too frequently. I had used it 401 times, in fact, which is more times than I had used the name of the main character. The word was "just."

"Just" is different than many other frequently used words. "It's" or "so" are understandable, and you accept them as necessary and your eyes pass over them. But "just" is different. Much of the time, it's extraneous.

How could I use "just" 400 times, you ask? Like this.

1. I used "just" to limit or moderate a statement so that it wasn't too extreme.

"Sitting up is just too hard to do right now."

"I just wanted to talk, that's all."

This use freaked me out a little. I started to wonder if I found the word so many times in my writing because I say it a lot. And then I wondered if I say it a lot because I can't say anything directly and feel like I have to soften everything or like I'm always a bit defensive. It drove me a bit crazy there for a while.

2. I also used it when characters would stumble over their speech.

"I just . . . I just got so angry."

3. And sometimes it was a filler word and could easily be taken out:

"I guess I might as well just get straight to the point."

Pretty normal ways to use the word, but it was still excessive. You want to know what 400 justs look like?

just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just
just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just

And that makes for a very boring story. (Love the haphazard hard returns in the middle of this mass.)

But I went through each and every one and decided if I should cut, keep, or reword, and I got the number down to 247. It took several hours. I will never see "just" the same way again.

Another word I used too frequently was "awkward." I guess I was writing about teenagers, after all, so it makes sense. (Ooo, burn!) I had used it 50 times, and I whittled it down to 27. Because really, there are so many other words to describe the strange and special circumstances people sometimes find themselves in. Unpleasant pauses, for instance. An uncomfortable feeling. A clumsy high-five.

It was surprising to me to find out that I had these idiosyncrasies (and others—I also used parentheses way too much . . . like right now), but it was good to go back through and rewrite and tighten the story. And now I'm very careful about how and when I use "just." If I do use it, it has to be for a darn good reason because I'm not getting anywhere near 400 again.

How's the book?

The book is great! It's been a while since I have given an update, so here it is. A few kind and generous readers plowed through my completed first draft and gave me excellent suggestions for ways to make it better. So over the last couple months,  I was busy making revisions. I was surprised by some of the suggested revisions (like about the time I used "dear" when I was talking about the animal—the editor in me nearly cried at such a rookie mistake), but they were all really helpful. In the biz, these first readers are called beta readers. Now you're in the know. I, however, will continue to refer to them as friends and family members.

So the second draft is done, and I'm pretty happy with it.

Hang on. That sentence deserves more excitement. THE SECOND DRAFT IS DONE!!!!! It was a huge feat and it took a LOT of work, and I am extremely proud of myself and the finished product. It definitely didn't take me as long as the first draft, but it was still huge and medal worthy. So, thanks. I'll take one in gold.

There.

Anyway, story lines were smoothed out, the characterization got even better, and the whole thing got a nice polish. Plus, after focusing on certain chapters and scenes for a while there, and jumping around from place to place (coming up with synonyms for the many, many times I used the word "awkward," for instance), it was really nice to give it one last read through from start to finish. It made me remember that it really is a whole entire cohesive book that flows really well.

When I started this whole write-a-book thing, I, of course, had no idea what I was doing and imagined things very differently from how they turned out. In the beginning, I guessed that the book would have about 10 chapters and around 50,000 words. Silly, silly Ashley.

Here are the current stats:

• Chapters: 23
• Words: 80,000ish
• Pages: 272ish

And, if you'll remember from this post, here are stats for these even more important categories:

• Times I use the phrase "sugarbum": 2
• References to Tom Jones or a Tom Jones song: 3

So, yes, there's quite a difference. But now I know what it takes, and I bet I can pump out the next one even faster. (Especially because it's a children's book, but that's neither here nor there.)

So what now? Now I try my darnedest to interest an agent in my book so that he or she can, in turn, sell it to a publisher. You do this by querying (sending an email to an agent, explaining your work and why you're awesome) and receiving many rejections. I have sent out several queries and will send many, many, many more, I'm sure. But I'm excited for the rejections to start piling in because then it will make this whole process feel even more real. If someone can say no, then it's certainly possible for someone else to say yes. (And who knows? For some, multiple references to Tom Jones might be what seals the deal.)

Anyway, keep checking back each week as I share some of what I went through to get to this point and other random stuff I decide to write about. It'll be fun. And comment. If you comment, you'll definitely earn more cool points. And I know you need some.

(You might think insulting readers may not be the best way to keep them interested, but you would be wrong.)

Also, p.s., I don't think I've ever shared the name of said book, so here it is, the big reveal: My first book is titled LITTLE SUN, and you can read more about it by clicking on the title at the top of the page.

Now posting weekly

So this blog has been in the works for a long time, but it's finally up and running and ready to go. I will now be posting weekly—every Thursday—so follow along* as I share writing quandaries and adventures on the road to publishing awesomedom. (<— A phrase I just coined and a little taste of what you can expect to find here.)

*And seriously, follow my blog, if you'd be so kind. You will earn my thanks and many cool points if you do. Maybe like 500.

So, it's been a year.

That's right. It's been one year since I went public with my write-a-book-by-30 goal. What have I done since then? I wrote a book.

By the time I turned 30 last November, I had a significant rough draft under my belt. But there were some holes and it needed some revisions, so I kept working. I've been working on those and fine tuning and fine tuning for months (with several breaks in between because I sometimes get tired of myself).

But now I'm done! <pant, pant> (I seriously just finished the final revisions a few days ago and I'm still feeling a bit out of breath. It was hard work. My matted hair and glazed-over eyes had quite a tale to tell.) So I'm done and I'm quite proud. It was a feat, and I accomplished it. There are more feats ahead, like getting an agent and getting published, but at least I've done this much. And even though this book has been my constant companion for the last year, staring it in the face for hours on end, and a nearly constant source of emotional upheaval (for good and for bad), I don't hate it.

But I wouldn't say I'm in love with it either. The hard part about doing this is having better taste than what I can actually produce. It's not as good as I want it to be, and that's a hard pill to swallow. But I think it's a great first draft, I'm proud that I wrote it, and I will focus on that.

So here's where things stand:

• I have a first draft, and now it's being read by a few friends and family for some much needed feedback while I put my feet up and catch up on all the ice cream I've been too busy to eat.
• I have a first draft, which means there will be other drafts. This almost makes me cry a little, like a baby, because getting to this point was such a challenge, but I think the first might be the hardest? Maybe? Someone tell me it is. At least I know how to get this far now, and I don't have to start at zero all over again. (That is, until I decide to write another book.)
• So I will continue to revise and make it the best it can possibly be.
• And then I will start querying for an agent.
• And then that agent will try to get my book published.
• And then it will get published and I will finally get to swim in that pool full of pink starbursts like I've always wanted.

Thanks to anyone and everyone for your excitement and questions. Talking about the book kept me excited and motivated to finish. And there's only more excitement to come! <pant, pant>

On writing a book: Part 5 or whatever number I'm on

[Pretend that you just asked, "How's your book coming?"]

Well, I'm so glad you asked! Here's what I've been doing, since my birthday deadline, in my make-it-up-as-I-go-along journey to write a novel:

• realizing how underdeveloped the book was
• and thereby dreaming up another couple of storylines almost involuntarily (Brains are weird—blessings and curses, if you ask me. Sometimes mine totally comes through with some pretty ingenious ideas, and other times I stare at the screen and the best it can come up with is to drool.)
• filling in necessary holes
• adding detail and fleshing out scenes since I'm a pretty simple, barebones kind of writer in the beginning stages (Apparently. This was new to me.)
• changing a character's name (This was weird. It was just never sitting well with me and so it needed to be changed. I have found that when I need to come up with a name for a character, what I pick almost invariably sounds weird to me for about a week or so. It sounds trite and fake and totally made up, which, of course, it was. But then I get over it and they start to sound like real people (or at least real characters), but this one was not doing it, so it had to go.)
• studying up on querying, which is the next step I will take when I have a solid manuscript ready to put out there.