Revising: Overused Words

One of the things I consciously tried to regulate, whilst working on my novel, was word frequency. I remember Stephenie Meyer being mocked for using "liquid topaz" on nearly every page of Twilight to describe Edward's eyes, and I knew I had to work hard so no one could mock me for anything similar.

And I thought I was safe. But one friendly critiquer brought it to my attention that there was a word I used much too frequently. I had used it 401 times, in fact, which is more times than I had used the name of the main character. The word was "just."

"Just" is different than many other frequently used words. "It's" or "so" are understandable, and you accept them as necessary and your eyes pass over them. But "just" is different. Much of the time, it's extraneous.

How could I use "just" 400 times, you ask? Like this.

1. I used "just" to limit or moderate a statement so that it wasn't too extreme.

"Sitting up is just too hard to do right now."

"I just wanted to talk, that's all."

This use freaked me out a little. I started to wonder if I found the word so many times in my writing because I say it a lot. And then I wondered if I say it a lot because I can't say anything directly and feel like I have to soften everything or like I'm always a bit defensive. It drove me a bit crazy there for a while.

2. I also used it when characters would stumble over their speech.

"I just . . . I just got so angry."

3. And sometimes it was a filler word and could easily be taken out:

"I guess I might as well just get straight to the point."

Pretty normal ways to use the word, but it was still excessive. You want to know what 400 justs look like?

just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just
just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just

And that makes for a very boring story. (Love the haphazard hard returns in the middle of this mass.)

But I went through each and every one and decided if I should cut, keep, or reword, and I got the number down to 247. It took several hours. I will never see "just" the same way again.

Another word I used too frequently was "awkward." I guess I was writing about teenagers, after all, so it makes sense. (Ooo, burn!) I had used it 50 times, and I whittled it down to 27. Because really, there are so many other words to describe the strange and special circumstances people sometimes find themselves in. Unpleasant pauses, for instance. An uncomfortable feeling. A clumsy high-five.

It was surprising to me to find out that I had these idiosyncrasies (and others—I also used parentheses way too much . . . like right now), but it was good to go back through and rewrite and tighten the story. And now I'm very careful about how and when I use "just." If I do use it, it has to be for a darn good reason because I'm not getting anywhere near 400 again.

How's the book?

The book is great! It's been a while since I have given an update, so here it is. A few kind and generous readers plowed through my completed first draft and gave me excellent suggestions for ways to make it better. So over the last couple months,  I was busy making revisions. I was surprised by some of the suggested revisions (like about the time I used "dear" when I was talking about the animal—the editor in me nearly cried at such a rookie mistake), but they were all really helpful. In the biz, these first readers are called beta readers. Now you're in the know. I, however, will continue to refer to them as friends and family members.

So the second draft is done, and I'm pretty happy with it.

Hang on. That sentence deserves more excitement. THE SECOND DRAFT IS DONE!!!!! It was a huge feat and it took a LOT of work, and I am extremely proud of myself and the finished product. It definitely didn't take me as long as the first draft, but it was still huge and medal worthy. So, thanks. I'll take one in gold.

There.

Anyway, story lines were smoothed out, the characterization got even better, and the whole thing got a nice polish. Plus, after focusing on certain chapters and scenes for a while there, and jumping around from place to place (coming up with synonyms for the many, many times I used the word "awkward," for instance), it was really nice to give it one last read through from start to finish. It made me remember that it really is a whole entire cohesive book that flows really well.

When I started this whole write-a-book thing, I, of course, had no idea what I was doing and imagined things very differently from how they turned out. In the beginning, I guessed that the book would have about 10 chapters and around 50,000 words. Silly, silly Ashley.

Here are the current stats:

• Chapters: 23
• Words: 80,000ish
• Pages: 272ish

And, if you'll remember from this post, here are stats for these even more important categories:

• Times I use the phrase "sugarbum": 2
• References to Tom Jones or a Tom Jones song: 3

So, yes, there's quite a difference. But now I know what it takes, and I bet I can pump out the next one even faster. (Especially because it's a children's book, but that's neither here nor there.)

So what now? Now I try my darnedest to interest an agent in my book so that he or she can, in turn, sell it to a publisher. You do this by querying (sending an email to an agent, explaining your work and why you're awesome) and receiving many rejections. I have sent out several queries and will send many, many, many more, I'm sure. But I'm excited for the rejections to start piling in because then it will make this whole process feel even more real. If someone can say no, then it's certainly possible for someone else to say yes. (And who knows? For some, multiple references to Tom Jones might be what seals the deal.)

Anyway, keep checking back each week as I share some of what I went through to get to this point and other random stuff I decide to write about. It'll be fun. And comment. If you comment, you'll definitely earn more cool points. And I know you need some.

(You might think insulting readers may not be the best way to keep them interested, but you would be wrong.)

Also, p.s., I don't think I've ever shared the name of said book, so here it is, the big reveal: My first book is titled LITTLE SUN, and you can read more about it by clicking on the title at the top of the page.

Now posting weekly

So this blog has been in the works for a long time, but it's finally up and running and ready to go. I will now be posting weekly—every Thursday—so follow along* as I share writing quandaries and adventures on the road to publishing awesomedom. (<— A phrase I just coined and a little taste of what you can expect to find here.)

*And seriously, follow my blog, if you'd be so kind. You will earn my thanks and many cool points if you do. Maybe like 500.